Manipulating Myself Into Being Happy

There are days where I convince myself I am happy, and it always works. Like, I am full-on delusional. I am convinced that I am so happy, even when things around me aren't going well. Had plans and it rained? I am happy that the trees are eating. Broke my favorite shoes? Finally have a reason for a new one! Bad day at work? I deserve a treat then! What can make me feel sad if I am fully convinced that, no matter what, I am happy? Life really is all rainbows and butterflies!! 

Lately, I've been having good days one after another, I am on a 30-day streak! It's such a huge jump to how I used to be, because honestly, back then, I was really depressed. Nowadays, I'm pretty sure sprinkles and glitter come out of my shoes every time I walk around. I am so happy, and everyday is the perfect day! 

When people say that "it's all a mindset thing," I still don't believe that only because I know how it feels to be so down, you can't think of anything else. But here's the thing, lately, I've been convincing myself that there's a silver-lining in everything. Even if it's something that completely ruined my day, somehow and someway, my mind will find a way to romanticize that and turn it into something positive and happy. I don't even know when I started doing this, but I just did, and it's going great for me lately! 

For example, I currently work 10-hour shifts in a facility for four days in a row. Lately, I've been extremely suffering from pain on my feet due to the metal steel-toe slip covers I was required to wear. The pain would start from the soles of my feet, and I could feel the nerves in my calves up to my thighs throbbing in pain. After my 10-hour shifts, I could barely walk! On top of that, there's not a lot of time I could spend seating in my job. I am constantly in my feet, and I am constantly walking. However, after eight days of excruciating feet pain, my mind managed to spin this whole dilemma into something positive. I mean, yes, my legs are hurting, but everyone is so friendly, sweet, and kind in our facility that I don't mind being in there! It's simply an opportunity for me to get to know everybody and make friends! And yes, sure, my feet is throbbing, but after a full eight hours of sleep, it always heals itself! 

I have developed the tendency to manipulate myself into happiness and joy. In everything that happens to me, even when it is something physically or emotionally painful or something that doesn't matter, I would always find a way to turn it into something positive. And it's doing wonderful things in my life! I honestly have never seen more beautiful days than now. Regardless if someone is mean, condescending, or frustrating to me, yes, I would have a hint of irritation, but ultimately, I move on to happier, more joyful things faster than I've ever been.

If it was the version of me a couple of years ago that doesn't have a lot of patience and happiness, that got her feet throbbing for 10 hours straight, she would've probably quit. However, since I developed this kind of mindset, I acknowledge that even though there are bad things that could potentially be happening around me, I would purposefully put my lenses on things that make me happier, and I intentionally decide to focus on that instead. 

Yes, there are things that could ruin my day, but it could only ruin it if I allow it, and lately, I don't feel like allowing it. I am happy, and regardless of what is going on outside of my body, in which, most of the time, I do not have control over, I will remain happy. It's an untouchable, unmovable force. Also, I do believe in the saying "I think, therefore, I am"

I think I am happy; therefore, I am happy. 

What a life. 

All the love, 

Indira.